And know that you are everything

Back in high school, music was a necessary and palpable force in my life. My friends and I lived and died by the bands we loved and blasted — ‘NSYNC, Hanson, Britney Spears, Dashboard Confessional — until we could sing their tunes in our sleep. Those songs are the soundtrack of my adolescence, permeating every scene and memory.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve scurried away from music. No longer spending hours each day walking around campus with my iPod and disinterested in playing anything at my desk, I don’t listen to much that’s new — or anything at all — these days. In my car I skip the radio and put in an audiobook. And I just don’t have many other listening opportunities beyond that.

So Spencer and I haven’t had “a song.” Some quintessential tune that makes me think of him with stars in my eyes, a ballad gives voice to our relationship. With R., my first boyfriend, there was “All My Life” (by K-Ci and JoJo — don’t hate). M. and I had Hoobastank’s “The Reason” (which is sort of a sad song, really, now that I’m thinking about it), and with P. it was “The Luckiest” by Ben Folds. There were plenty of other tunes sprinkled in there, too, like The Fray’s “Look After You” — a song I can’t hear without thinking of J. and an ill-fated dance at his brother’s wedding.

But Spence and I? We don’t have any memories inextricably tied up in music. We both like Nicole Atkins, his favorite singer, but she doesn’t have a song that makes me feel swoony. Nothing else comes to mind. Our relationship has been without a theme song.

Until now.

I learned years ago that the Goo Goo Dolls were from Buffalo, N.Y., just north of my boyfriend’s hometown. I can’t say I’ve always been a huge fan, but tunes like “Slide” and “Iris” were definitely around during my formative years. It’s great they’re still playing music and making new stuff — like “All That You Are.”

It’s The One. Our Song.

Walking out of the mall recently, I was loaded down with bags and hurrying back to the office. It’s that time of year again — Christmas shopping season — and no one emerges from all this unscathed. I just wanted to throw my stuff in the car and get to work, where a thousand projects waited in my inbox.

That’s when I heard it.

In my limited radio-listening world, I must have heard “All That You Are” at some point — or maybe it was just that I instantly recognized Johnny Rzeznick’s trademark vocals. Whatever it was, the opening bars of the song had me literally pausing in the middle of a street. The song was still playing clear and strong outside a department store, flooding the parking lot with its haunting melody. I put my bags in the front seat and stood, listening. I was by myself but didn’t feel alone.

Because the band is from Spencer’s home state (and almost city); because I love the words and the sentiment; because I know we enter each relationship a little bit battered but hopeful that we’re going to find something real, something lasting, with another person —

And because I fell in love again —

And because I know what it’s like to be loved in return —

I formally nominate the Goo Goo Dolls’ “All That You Are” for the prized title of the Official Anthem of Megan and Spencer.

I really hope it gets approved.


Do you and your significant other have A Song? How did you choose it — or did it choose you?

14 thoughts on “And know that you are everything

  1. I love the Goo Goo Dolls! I’m from Rochester, NY and didn’t realize they were from Buffalo. That’s cool. More and more big names are emerging from the big snowy hole of upstate NY that I hold dear to my heart. 🙂


  2. While I’m not a nut with music like I used to be, there are dozens of songs that would make up the soundtrack of my husband and I, who have been together for 22 years. I can hear a song, and be transported back to a moment in time. One particular one that we were listening to around the time we got married was “The One” by Elton John.


  3. How cute. “Slide” actually reminds me of my very first boyfriend. 🙂

    I have a million songs that remind me of my husband. We recently agreed to replace Our Song with “January Wedding” by The Avett Brothers. Because if it had been around when we got married, it would definitely have been our first dance.


  4. I love this! I can relate to fading out as far as the music addiction goes… I used to die if i couldn’t have my iPod on for the five minutes between classes, but now I don’t use it sometimes for days at a time.

    My husband’s and my song is “Jai-Ho” by the Pussycat Dolls — kind of silly. We were friends for a long time before we started dating, and the turning point was one night when we were watching Slumdog Millionaire with a big group of friends. We danced to a slow song first at our wedding but then that one came on next. 🙂


  5. A high school boyfriend and I had “Iris” by the Goo Goo Dolls as our song. With the husband, it’s more that we have A Band than A Song. Select just about any Counting Crows song, and you’ll have the soundtrack to some memory (or ten), including our first dance at our wedding to Goodnight L.A. (“What brings me down now is love, ’cause I can never get enough.”) So glad that you and Spencer have a song at long last!


  6. No one definite song, there are a few that make me think of my boyfriend because of the times they were played. I’m not sure if he’d remember them, I should probably ask him! It is nice to have a song though, so good to hear that you have one 🙂


  7. I’ve never had a “couple song”, I just never was able to pin point a song that completely epitomized a relationship. Instead, there’s a ton of songs that I associate with past loves and friends. That works for me.


  8. My boyfriend and I definitely have a song. I like to think that it kind of chose us. I remember hearing it and knowing it was perfect for us. I kind of came across it before we were even together and yet it still fits. It’s called “My Beautiful Rescue” by a small band called This Providence. They actually just recently came out with a remastered version of it that is also quite nice.

    Check it out if you have a chance. I’m listening to the Goo Goo Dolls right now. You’ve inspired me.


  9. My husband and I don’t have a song. But I have to admit you picked a great song! I love the Goo Goo Dolls. I had to laugh a little because a lot of the artists you mentioned as being in your life soundtrack are also in mine.


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